The truth about Methadone and Pain Management…

OK… my level of frustration has reached a level where I must educate someone, somewhere, knowing that it may not make a difference in my life, but this may help another person suffering from chronic pain.

This is how I create a silver lining when all I can see are dark clouds.

Dan and I have MS. It manifests as extreme chronic pain. In order to maintain a manageable quality of life, we take pain medications.

There is one medication, used for decades for long lasting pain control. It has also been used to help addicts get off of heroin. For us, Methadone has been a life saver but it also has damned us to extreme discrimination.

Methadone works on specific receptors in the brain. These receptors are also subject to heroin.  Think of keys and locks.  The drug is the key, the brain cell is the lock.  Methadone, when used for drug abuse, blocks the cell’s lock so that heroin cannot act upon the brain. When used for pain control, it unlocks the nerve cell and suppresses the pain signals, thus reducing pain.

We each have been prescribed low dose methadone (for pain control) for over a decade. We have never, ever, even tried heroin. Why are we being treated like drug abusers?

Our current problem is finding a doctor out here in rural Illinois that is willing to prescribe methadone for pain control. Even the “pain management specialists” are scared of it. But here’s the fucker- we have less than 2 weeks of medication left. It would be quite dangerous if we just stop the medication. The withdrawal would stress our bodies- stress we cannot afford.
Dan has survived 3 pulmonary embolism since we got married  (a blessed miracle three times over) – it is this kind of stress that could generate another clot.

We have an appointment with one doc at the end of March. There is no way we can make it to then.

So everyone- please understand. Methadone is a well studied and widely used pain control medication. Don’t just assume that it’s for drug abuse. 

I just pray that we find a solution.
Thanks for listening….

with Love, Light and Blessings….


Done and signed…


She is done…
“Unnamed” watercolor on 140lb paper 12×18

And I am pleased. I’m quite happy how this ended up. I’m learning the rose.

Many years ago, an art teacher of mine (Sal) got frustrated with me because I wanted to do a painting of my wedding bouquet. It had a rose or two in it. It was the one (and only) time I let him use my brush. He painted a few strokes and it gave the impression of a rose.

I have improved greatly since then. I am grateful for the opportunities that I have been blessed with that has brought my craft to a whole new level….

I think I still have his email someplace…. maybe I should send this to Sal…

Peace be with us all…

with Love, Light and Blessings….

Ode to our Dragon

A black bearded
Insides dry and
Until she is fed
   Grounds and water

A fire builds
In her belly
    Born of spark
A growl and hiss
    A gurgle and then

A gift is given
   An elixir dark and
     Our Dragon
Is a good Dragon.
  A keeper.
      For sure.

Suzanne Kriesant

with Love, Light and Blessings….

She continues…


The background is added and I made the darks darker ...

What a difference
    ….the color wheel doesn’t lie….
Opposites bring each other out
        Show so much more
Than seen before…

Faith strengthened
… instincts confirmed…
I am learning
        …the language of the Rose…

Suzanne L Kriesant

Namasté,  my dear Reader…

with Love, Light and Blessings….


Work continues
   Although more meditation
Than toil
      What is the color of Dark?
   What is the color of Light?
Questions asked
      Answer not immediate
But within the process…

    The answer is revealed
drop by drop,
    Pigment settles, dries,
          lighter than first appears

Part faith
  Part experience
Combined and entrusted
        my Beloved will
    understand the adoration
            enfolded within….

Peace be with us all….


As of this moment, she continues to grow and change, stroke by stroke and I am grateful.

with Love, Light and Blessings….

The Rose continues….


This is where I stopped for's getting there

Greetings and salutations my Dear Reader!

Just a quick post before retiring for the evening. I’ve gone back into creating mode. I’m a much happier person when I am. I have my awesome bright lamp, a foot stool (so my feet don’t fall asleep) and quiet company. All good things. I am grateful…


Session one- sketched out basic form of my rose...


Here I'm trying to figure out what color the shadows are when the flower is yellow...



This is where I stopped for's getting there

Peace to us all.

Ps- happy Valentine’s day!

with Love, Light and Blessings….

Back to my craft….

When I started this blog, I envisioned a rich dialogue about creating. Manifesting new circumstances, creating art that does more than please the eyes…

Sorry- I got caught up in the emotions. I take that back.  I’m not sorry. I am grateful for you, my dear reader, and for your willingness to come along with me on this journey back to center.

So- 4 years ago, for my New Year’s resolution, I promised myself that I would create something every day. I admit, although I was creating a bit here and there- I wasn’t dedicating my practice. So here’s today’s creations…


I came upstairs for a cigarette (i know, i know... ) Pudders didn't come out for suggles. I sketched her from memory. Kind of like petting...but with a pen...

I haven’t made time to sketch in a long time. Maybe I’ll set a time daily,  just for sketching. I’ll let you know how that goes…


Kirkigami is like origami but after you fold, you carefully cut out the design.

Seeing that Valentine’s day is tomorrow- I was looking for things to make Dan. Several Christmases ago, Dan bought me so much cool paper…so blessed. This one is not colored (green, blue,  pink, yellow). Using my copy of a Kirkigami book, I cut these out. I can’t wait to see what I use these on/for…

For now-
My bed is calling. Night all.
Peace be with us all….

with Love, Light and Blessings….